Last weekend I was in Tampa, Florida for the first of several in-person events as part of a year long EnergyRich® Elite Mastermind Group I joined (here’s a picture of me with Heather Dominick my dear coach and leader of this group). The group and the event was unbelievably spectacular and I felt it was a great time to write a bit about the benefits of working with someone (or a facilitated group) who can be a coach and mentor to you along your journey.

First let me share with you that I did not take joining this group lightly. It is the most significant investment of time and money I have made to a program in my life (and that’s saying something). To be fully truthful with you, it is a big stretch for me and every last excuse and story I tell myself about money joined me on my journey to a decision. After much head AND heart-centered reflection, I chose to be in charge of my choices rather than be at the whims of other people’s opinions or be a servant to my money (rather than having it serve me). It is only early February and I have already had breakthroughs and transformational growth and cannot wait to continue my journey with this group for the next 11 months.

Here are four specific ways having a coach can transform your life and your business/career. I know this because I have experienced it firsthand and I’ve heard it from my clients.

Big Thinking And Holding A Vision Of You At Your Highest Potential

We think they way we think because it is always the way we have thought. What we see as possible for ourselves is a combination of past experiences and what we witness in those who we surround ourselves with. For most people their future looks very much like their present circumstances +/- 10%. Why? Because that is all that you know, think is possible, or will give yourself permission to want. With a coach at your side you get to live in the realm of possibility of much, much more. That more can be anything you want it to be – common things are more money, more time, more meaning, more satisfaction. It can also be more of that intangible spark that makes your passion and purpose be expressed in the world in a way that only you can deliver. A coach will hold you in that highest vision even when you feel like crap or your outer results aren’t what you want to see (yet). This isn’t about denial or wishful thinking, but about making that powerful shift into the role of creating that vision you most want for your life personally and professionally. And if you don’t yet know what that vision, what “It” is, she can help you discover it, name it, and claim it.

Read more of 4 Ways You Benefit from Having a Coach…

Whatever holiday you celebrate and however you enjoy it, inevitably the rhythm of business changes during the last few weeks of the year. You can use this time to your advantage to bring a strong close to 2009 and an even more powerful start to 2010 whether you are a business owner or employee. You don’t even have to work hard to make it happen.

The secret is to gear your activities to answer one of two questions:

1) What do I need to do to bring the current year to powerful completion?

2) What can I do to set myself up for success in the year ahead?

Here are my top 5 tips of how you can do that based on my own experience and that of the experts I cite below.

1) Create a Clean Slate

Wrap up all those little hanging chads from 2009. That includes bookkeeping, invoicing, unfinished client communications, and filing. Nothing sends you into 2010 with cinder blocks tied to your feet more than a whole bunch of unfinished business from 2009. If you have outstanding items far too big to bring to full completion then simply organize, prioritize, and communicate with a firm date of when it will be handled in January. Finances have a natural end of year deadline for business planning and tax purposes. Some good tips on how to organize finances as a freelancer can be found here.

2) Organize, File, and Purge

While you’re grooving from number one, adopt the do it or dump it mentality with all your files and records including financial ones.  Get organized for tax season (it’ll be here before you know it!).  Purge old client files.  Empty your entire inbox.  Shred sensitive paper files you no longer need.  Clean the closet and filing cabinets.  Anything you can do to clear your space and simplify will reap rewards and replenish you with energy and space (literally and emotionally).  Here are some filing system tips to consider.

3) Celebrate Your Accomplishments

Now is the time to take stock of what you accomplished in 2009.  Even though it was a tough year for many, you have things to celebrate.  Take stock of 2009:

• What did you accomplish?
• What did you earn? what did you save? what debt do you have?
• What new skills did you learn?
• In what ways did you grow and evolve as a person?

You can’t get where you want to go without knowing where you are.  This step is about getting clear on where “here” is.  And here’s a hint – you don’t have to have a “save the world” accomplishment to create and savor your list.  Zandria sets a great example of celebrating in “Five Things I’m Proud Of (From 2009)”. You need to celebrate not only the tangible professional and financial milestones but also the personal ones.

4) Plan for 2010

“Those who fail to plan, plan to fail.”  It’s that simple. What are your goals for 2010?  I’m not a huge goal setting person in terms of hard-core goals all mapped on paper.  Yet I am a huge proponent of setting your intentions for the year and putting that in writing.  Your intentions of what you want to see happen in your life and business (from vacation ideas to income goals) as well as how you want to feel and BE as you go about your year.  Now is the time to do it.  If you wait until January, you’ll likely get swept into the wave of “same-old, same-old” and find yourself at the whims of everyone and everything else.

Create your learning plan.  If the past few years have taught us anything it is that learning and growing is the key to long-term success as a business owner or employee.  The landscape keeps changing and you need to keep your skills fresh and expanding. Here’s an excellent article on creating your learning plan for 2010.  One way to keep learning is to devour books regularly. Check out Melinda Emerson’s small business reading list Part I and Part II.

5) Rest & Relax

By all means you work your tail off all year — chill out for a bit. Create some breathing space.  Reconnect with family and friends. Take a nap.  Indulge with some extra time spent on your hobbies.  The point of the holidays is to make them meaningful
so do it.  Don’t let a to-do list or itch to get a jump on 2010 derail you from the here and now.  Handle items one through four the best you can and then let go.

What are your best tips for using the holiday time to your advantage for your business or career?

Can’t let today pass by without calling attention to the great article I was privileged to be a part of.   Today’s issue of The Intelligencer ran an article entitled Pursuing a Dream about people starting businesses during the recession.

I was thrilled to have an opportunity to be a part of the article (complete with a creative photo of me filling the center of the page) and share some of my expertise gleaned from my own experience and that of coaching clients who are starting their own businesses.

The article is ripe with stories about people who have started their businesses as a result of losing their jobs.  Some very important statistics that all business owners need to know round out the feature.

You can read the complete article online at the Intelligencer website.

If you prefer a pdf, you can download it from my website.

I recently received a question on LinkedIn from one of my connections who is a trainer and job search specialist. She was looking for stories about how keeping a positive attitude is crucial to success in one’s job hunt during these times. In my reply, while I acknowledged that a positive attitude is important, it’ll only get you so far. There is something far more important to succeeding whether it is the job hunt or building your business.

That something is your beliefs. Beliefs run deeper than attitude and consciously or unconsciously (often the case) have more to do with our success or lack thereof than anything else. When your beliefs are not aligned with what you say you want, your feelings take a hit (no matter how much positive attitude I will put on a happy face you do), your vibrational energy lowers, and instead of attracting what you say you want, you get mud.

I’m not trying to give positive attitude a bad rap. It is an important part of your success, just not the savior so many make it up to be. As Millionaire Mommy Next Door says, your attitude is your choice so make it a positive one.

In “Being positive…” Trish shares what we’ve all experienced at one time or another:

OK, so I am on a mission to change my outlook…it can be hard, it is hard, but I will do it!

I remember there was a time when I was very positive, always smiling and not too much got me down, I want that person back and I will get her back, I know it.

It is amazing that when you feel good, have confidence and a positive outlook, things do go well, or perhaps it is just that they at least appear that way as your attitude reflects it no matter what life is throwing at you.

It is true that with a positive attitude things seem to go better and we tend to feel better which increases not only our enjoyment but also our ability to attract success.

I don’t know about you but sometimes putting on a positive attitude, especially when it doesn’t match up with how I’m feeling feels more like a bunch of BS than a success strategy. I have known women who with their always upbeat, positive, “Can Do” attitudes simply smile through their pain as they go through yet another unfortunate circumstance.

The most successful people I have experienced know how to (or ask a coach to help them) dig beneath the surface and uncover the underlying beliefs that keep them stuck. The beliefs you have are like the operating system on your computer – it is always running the show whether you acknowledge it or not. The key to success is making these beliefs conscious, feeling the feelings that accompany them, and then transforming those beliefs layer by layer until your beliefs align with what you most want to create (new job, successful business, perfect mate, etc.). When they align it is like that perfect ahhh you feel when you put that all important piece into a puzzle and make a picture or align all those darn colors on a Rubik’s cube. Tension melts away and energy is available and aligned for what you DO want.

In “What Does Managing Your Spiritual Energy Have to do with Your Success in Business?” Sharon Wilson gives a nice explanation on the power of beliefs. Her conclusion sums it up nicely:

On the other hand, when you do make that inner shift, it suddenly becomes easier for you to take actions that may have been uncomfortable for you before.

If you identify some of these patterns, and then learn a process to better manage your energy around them, you now have congruency.

You now have a situation where you can make into reality the vision you long to create, because you are congruent in your thoughts, feelings, words and actions.

So while a positive attitude is a great building block, if you really want the success you desire, look a little deeper to shift your beliefs and create a more powerful platform on which to stand.

Photo Credit: Flickr

Announcing the release of the eBook “Career & Money – How to Create a Life You Love On the Job and Off”. If you happen to read my column at Queercents you might remember the Career & Money series I wrote starting in March of 2007. It seemed almost like ancient history to me when Nina suggested I update it and compile it into an eBook. Well I am happy to say that it is now available for download and is recently updated.

As I reviewed every word of the original series I realized that it is so relevant in today’s environment. Now more than ever it is imperative to consciously create your personal and professional life in a way that fuels who you are while also providing the financial means to live the way you most desire.

There’s nothing flashy about this book. It is about the fundamentals. The foundational questions you need to answer for yourself as it relates to your life and career. They are even more true today than they were 18 months ago when money and the markets were still flying high. Regardless of the economic climate I am a firm believer that today is the first day in the rest of your life and it is imperative to seize the day and live fully in the present moment while also creating an inspiring future.

Here’s a look at the table of contents:

Part 1: Intention, Plan and Goals
Part 2: How to Determine if You Want a Career or a Job
Part 3: What are your values? How much do you need/want to earn?
Part 4: How Can You Earn Money?
Part 4A: Skills vs. Passion
Part 5: Landing the Job (Part One)
Part 6: Landing the Job – Make and Close the Deal
Part 7: Staring Your Own Business
Part 8: Making the Most of Your Career
Part 9: Re-pot, Re-invent, Re-visit
Part 10: Work & Happiness
Part 11: Retirement
Want to Learn More?

I cover a lot of ground in this book. I guarantee if you do the exercises contained in it you will walk away with clarity and actionable next steps.

If you are ready to learn how to get started designing a professional life that fits WHO you are instead of how you were told it “should” look today… Buy the Career & Money eBook here for just $7.

If someone were to ask me what is the most important question you could ask about your career this would be it: Is it what you want to be doing or what you feel you “should” be doing? The answer to this question is extremely telling and often determines the level of success, enjoyment, and fulfillment you can attain in your professional life. Think about it. Compare it to your personal life. If you have an event to go to that you truly want to attend you are excited, have a positive frame of mind, and get the most out of it. If you have some obligation you need to attend because you “should” or your family will disown you if you don’t, are you nearly as enthusiastic? In the end do you enjoy the experience or simply endure it?

I could certainly take a spiritual angle and assert that your experience is what you make it and that even in situations that stretch you that you could adopt a chop wood, carry water mindset:

What that means is that the tasks are the same, but who you are being as you do the tasks is totally different. While I am certainly not claiming enlightenment, I can say that I am so much better at being clear, open, and present with a task than I ever was before. Even tasks that are exhausting and not quite my cup of tea. Instead I did my best to approach it with the bigger picture in mind – serving families in need of decent housing and with the mindset that anything you do can be a meditation if you choose to allow it to be. And, when you do that a whole new world opens up to you.

I totally believe this mindset is crucial to living fully. Engaging in experiences that stretch you are enriching. However from a day in and day out perspective would you rather spend your time doing something that works for you or suffering like a martyr attemping to fulfill someone else’s expectations of you?

How do you know what that something you most want to be doing is? You discover it by looking inside yourself. Penelope Trunk writes in “Why you already know what you should be doing next”

Do you want to know what you should do right now? Do you want to know what your best bet is for your next career? Look at what you were doing when you were a kid. Nothing changes when you grow up except that you get clouded vision from thinking about what you SHOULD do — to be rich, or successful, or to please your parents or peers… the possibilities for should are endless.

Our childhood really does hold clues. It is not just a New Age inner child thing. The essence of who we are and what makes us tick is formed early. That doesn’t mean we don’t evolve or change, just the opposite. However, I know if I look back on what interested me as a child and how I liked to be in the world, I see a much purer reflection of what my soul most yearns for even now. I may have better taste in wine, but I still love to explore, learn, be outside in nature, and laugh hysterically. I hated being confined by rules of the classroom then and I still thrive outside the corporate cube now as a business owner. Why? Because I discovered early on as I was being coached that I have a core need to be unrestricted, otherwise I rebel. Hmmmm, corporate cubes cause brain damage and are restricting… and I thrive outside of them…maybe there is a connection, eh?

The idea of “Shoulds” and expectations seem to be even more crushing to the generation younger than I. The Office Newb tells it like it is from the Twenty-Something perspective in “Success Is Relative (Especially When Relatives Determine Your Success)”:

What made these well-educated, high-achieving women desperate enough to risk their reputations for 15-minutes of fame?

Could it be a constant pressure to succeed from parents, professors, bosses and popular media?

A query into the Merriam-Webster dictionary shows the definition of success to be: The attainment of wealth, favor, or eminence.

What troubles me about this definition is that it defines success through a third-party point of view. Gaining favor? Having superiority? These are all things subject to other people’s perceptions rather than a personal measure of fulfillment and meaning. This drive to succeed, to achieve based on someone else’s definition of success is wreaking havoc on our generation, a generation raised to believe that achievement is everything.

From a young age, most Millennials have been told they need to be “well-rounded.” College admission boards wants students who can “do-it-all,” so children are being pushed at younger and younger ages into soccer teams, ballet lessons, foreign-language classes and more with rarely a thought as to whether a child really enjoys the activity or not.

Constant pressure to live up to someone else’s expectations is a recipe for misery and dis-ease. The link between stress and health is strong and all over the news all the time. Grab Some Health News states in “Stress and Heart Disease – Evidence Mounts”:

Previous studies have supported the link between stress and the development of disease. The role of inflammation is well defined as it related to diabetes, heart disease, the formation of atherosclerosis, and perhaps depression. Stress releases hormones in the body that promote the release of cortisol. Prolonged exposure to cortisol disrupts immunity, leads to sleep loss, heart disease, and increases the risk of obesity. It also leads to digestive problems.

Studies find that Americans are more dissatisfied than ever with their levels of happiness, in spite of increases in income.

Sacrificing what you really want simply for a paycheck just doesn’t cut it. You can’t fool your soul and you can’t fool your body. The world is teeming with people earning a good to excellent income but who are miserable beyond words.

Sometimes we do what we want to do but put excess pressure on ourselves because we want to live up to our own expectations. Consider the case of being a business owner and a parent. As a working mother, Kathy Murdock asks “Do Parents in Business Face More Stress to Succeed?”

They listen. As business owners we need to keep this in mind and use it as we operate our companies.

I believe that having two daughters has placed a bit more stress on my shoulders to succeed. I want to do so not just for myself, but for my family as well. in addition, I want them to see me working hard to accomplish my goals. I’d also like them to see that when you do work hard, your business can grow, and I hope in the future this is exactly what I am able to prove to them. Plus, as a mother to two daughters, I’d love for them to understand that they can do whatever they want in life, too. I can tell them this over and over, but what better way to get the point across than to show them?

Yes indeed children listen to what we say and most importantly to what we leave unsaid. That is why we need to take the time to go within and see what our heart is telling us about what we really want, because we aren’t fooling anyone if we’re throwing out what we really want in order to fulfill a self-imposed “should”. Hint — if you’re over the age of 18, all “shoulds” are self-imposed.

You can tap into what you really want and need to do next and create the life you most desire. I am living proof it can be done and I work with women all the time to help them do the same. All you need to be is willing…and ready to take that all important first step.