Have you ever needed to make a decision and then just when you thought you knew what you wanted to do, doubted yourself? In the “I want to do x,y,z…well, I don’t know maybe I shouldn’t? What if it’s the wrong choice? Maybe I don’t deserve it?” sort of way.
C’mon… tell me you haven’t ever done this, I dare you!
Almost everyone has felt this way at some time or another, but the question is – how familiar is this routine for you?
- Do you make it a habit to second-guess all your decisions?
- Do you doubt yourself from the get-go whenever an opportunity or challenge presents itself?
- Do you adopt inaction/keeper of the status quo as your mode of operation because you don’t want to risk taking action or speaking up because you might not do the “right” thing?
If this rings a bell, it is costing you in many ways. You may “think” it is insignificant, but in reality it costs you confidence and money. That’s right, it literally costs you money. Here’s why…
I used to spend hours, days and months, even years locked in analysis paralysis. I could sit in a cup of self-doubt for what seemed like forever. For several years there I made it my full time job. Here’s a sneak peek from one of those times early in my career. My boss would give me a new, more challenging assignment. While I knew I was intelligent and could figure anything out given time and resources, I would almost immediately launch into a panic. I would doubt my abilities, beat myself up because I wasn’t an instant expert at something I had never done before, and literally think “who am I to think I can be any good at this?” Everywhere I looked all I could see where obstacles and more opportunities to second-guess myself.
So you can see where this was not the best way to go about achieving something, right? You can see how this behavior kept me from stepping up to do new things and expand my responsibilities into a higher paying position, right?
I would gut it out through the project, turn in great results, and then what do you think I would do? That’s right…head right back to second-guessing myself all over again the next time something new came along. Rather than build on my achievements I would stay stuck because I couldn’t count on myself. I didn’t have the confidence I yearned for.
I share just this one example from my life, but you can see how living in a state of second-guessing leads to:
- Low self-confidence (even in the face of high achievement).
- Less opportunities flowing to you (who wants to offer opportunities to the scared and indecisive woman?).
- Reduced earning power because you never ask for or receive the money you deserve for the value you provide.
Wouldn’t you rather be someone who:
- Possesses unshakable confidence under any circumstance?
- Can pick and choose from multiple lucrative opportunities?
- Has money flow to you continuously and abundantly and is well compensated for the way you serve others?
Imagine what would be possible for you if you no longer second guessed your every move and simply moved forward with ease? Would decision-making be easier? Would you feel less guilty? Would you have more success? Would you simply just be happier and more peaceful?
Well, you CAN. Confidence doesn’t “just happen”, but you can acquire and develop it. All you must do is be willing to do some inner reflection and then move that into action each and every day in all that you do.
It breaks down into two powerful questions that I invite you to reflect upon and journal about:
1) Who am I and what kind of person do I most want to be?
2) What actions do I need to take to be that person now?
If you’re ready to make all that second-guessing yourself a thing of the past, contact me for an exploratory conversation about I can help you grow your business while creating a life you love (without all the overwhelm!)
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