Do you really want to realize and experience the things you dream about? The things you say you want? What you’ve been yearning for?
You are probably thinking, “Of course I do! What do you mean?! Why wouldn’t I?”
And, being the ruthlessly compassionate coach I am I’d say again…
Are you sure?
Here’s why I say that…and let me share something I know for sure by way of a story. I was recently re-listening to a wonderful book of parable called The Alchemist by Paul Coelho. The book is about a young man Santiago and his quest for fortune, his Personal Legend, and the decoding of the Language of the World. It takes place in an unnamed time in the areas of Spain and Egypt. Along his journey, he learns from many wise teachers along the way…humans, animals, and from what they call the omens (which I’d translate to be intuitive hits or guidance from spirit).
During one part of his story he is working at a crystal shop with the owner, a man who has owned this shop his entire life and has many unfulfilled dreams. The man talk about his dream, like that of many Muslims, is to make a lifetime pilgrimage to Mecca. He goes on to say he never expects he will actually go and complete the pilgrimage because the time never seems right and how he is too old.
As the discussion continues the man makes the very wise distinction that I wish to share with you today. And that is – the reason he never wants to complete the pilgrimage is because if he did, then what would he have to live for? You see, there is a big difference between dreaming the dream and realizing the dream. He only wants to dream the dream because it is what he holds onto. If he were to realize it, then what? What would he have left without the dream? Who would he be then? What would he have to live for if the dream was suddenly gone (because it was completed)? And so he never takes action toward making his dream a reality.
What do you see in this story? Does it ring true at all for you?
Ask yourself…do you really want to experience the dreams and goals you say you want? Do you want them to be a part of your present experience? Or is the “perpetual and forever just out of reach” promise of the dream what you live on?
There is no right or wrong answer here…just the truth, for you.
There’s nothing inherently wrong with loving the dream more than actually bringing that dream into your actual experience. Just be clear that it is the fantasy of it that you want, not the actual experience itself. Then, let yourself off the hook and release the lip service that you give toward actually doing something about it. [Read more…]